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Fake Gold

by Micki XO

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about

Have you ever felt like no matter what you do to try and escape the things you don’t want to feel or think about, you always end up back at square one? Maybe it’s trying to escape the effects of a mental illness, a bad memory, feelings you don’t want to feel, or trying to reach a goal you just can’t seem to reach. Micki XO can relate. She wrote “Fake Gold” to chronicle the struggles she had with feeling like she couldn’t escape the effects of her mental illness, and how she constantly wrestled with feeling like even when she was starting to make progress towards a more normal and healthy life, that something would happen to cause her to be back at square one. The title comes from her desperation to appear normal on the outside, while battling her demons on the inside. She was fake gold - shiny on the outside, but on the inside, she’s a cheaper kind of metal. With a synth-y dream pop sound, this delicate, yet powerful song will make you feel seen and heard. Like you’re not alone. Like you’re in a warm hug of understanding.

lyrics

Fake gold
Fake gold
Fake gold
Fake gold


Mmm
How did I end up in this place?
Feeling cheaper than fake gold
How did I end up in this place?
Where my emotions take control

Lost, not found
Starting to drown
In mistakes I want to erase
Exhaustion, fear
I haven’t been here in years
As tears stream down my face

Cold and numb
I’ve been here before
I don’t want to lose myself
Defeated again
I can’t take anymore
Please
Don’t let me lose myself

Mmm
How did I end up in this place?
Feeling cheaper than fake gold
How did I end up in this place?
Where my emotions take control

Lost, not found
Starting to drown
In mistakes I want to erase
Exhaustion, fear
I haven’t been here in years
As tears stream down my face

Lost, not found
Starting to drown
In mistakes I want to erase
Exhaustion, fear
I haven’t been here in years
As tears stream down my face

Fake gold
Fake gold
Fake gold
Yeah, baby, I’m fake gold

credits

released October 21, 2022
Production & Mixing: Make Music or Die
Mastering: Kris Crummett
Songwriting: Michelle Gilman

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Micki XO Portland, Oregon

Micki XO is a Portland pop vocalist and songwriter that dreams connecting with others through her lyrics and “dream pop meets industrial strangeness” style sound. Her music covers many topics, including mental health, self-love, and relationships. Her bliss and sanity was saved by music, and she hopes her own music will help someone else battle their own demons. ... more

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